Hey all!
Its been a couple of months since I have written, but I wanted to touch for a moment with you on a very important aspect of relationships.
As all of you who know me or have been acquainted with this blog know, I believe that it is in your best interest as a young man or woman to guard carefully your emotions within a relationship. By now, you know that kissing is an intimate engagement that ideally should be saved for marriage. Although young people might just look at it as innocent romantic expression or even "fun" within the boundaries of a relationship, it is a part of you that you cannot take back again even if you wanted to.
You may at this point call me ridiculous. Ok, and that is fine with me if you do. However, like any thing that you give, remember that you are giving that and along with it, a piece of your heart.
I write today because I came across a letter I wrote to myself, reminding myself in a particular relationship of the boundaries that I needed to create between that male friend and myself. It was, perhaps, one of the most special relationships I have ever had, and I felt the weight of the responsibility to remain pure. It was a great friend, whom I had no desire to injure, and although the ending of the story was a sad one, He was perhaps the most gentle of men I have ever dated and a best friend.
That relationship was a good example. We did have physical expression in our relationship, but it did not exceed anything that I would be ashamed to share. In no moment, was I treated as less than a princess, and he made sure of that. We were perfectly able to have romance in our relationship, without unfair caresses being stolen from either individual.
That was a long intro for what I would like to say to you.
I challenge you (and myself) to set your standards higher than before.
Re-evaluate the commitments that you have already made and boundaries you have set for yourself and you may discover discrepancies in your previous evaluations.
A goodnight kiss .... WITHOUT a close hug, touching of the hair, caressing of the arms or legs, ... is a clean kiss. This is a typical gesture of affection that does not extend beyond natural affection you might show a family member when done correctly.
Holding hands ... is a great feeling, great and sweet gesture of a friendship that has moved into a budding and beautiful relationship. However, I advise you not to move far from here, because it is unnecessary.
Holding... When you are in a beautiful relationship, these are the things that make it feel "so nice" but ... beware. An arm around your shoulders is quite different than an arm around your waist... a quick warm embrace . . . is much different than a drawn out embrace. especially when your feelings for someone are great.
Hugs . . . Is this a hug that honors that personal space that still belongs to the other individual? How close is too close? ... This is an important question to ask each other in a relationship and you will know if it is too close because your heat rises and warns you.
Be respectful and honorable of one another and do not put your boyfriend in a position of compromise. This can cost you a future friendship with him and can cost you a friendship temporarily with yourself. To hug can be more dangerous than it seems, if you are not guarding your vulnerability in that embrace. Guys... treat her the way you would treat a sister. Girls, space yourself and say no when necessary, carry yourself in an honorable way, not a seductive one.
This is NOT an all inclusive list, but perhaps it will get each of us thinking and re-evaluating a very important part of boundaries. Being in a relationship can be a lot of fun, but it is also a great responsibility.
Remember that you are children of the greatest King over all, and that makes you princes and princesses. Act likewise.
With much love.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
What do you long for?
Dear Friends,
I found this piece in my poetry collection, and felt that it was important to share it with you. These are words for all who long after a pure heart. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." Mt. 5:8
Guidance for her troubled heart
by Joanna, 2009
Grow up...
Be the woman that God called her to be
Bear the fruit of the Spirit
Cast her cares upon God
Don't worry about tomorrow...
Stop repressing
Start expressing
Deal with it properly
Keep on believing
Believe some more
BELIEVE
Don't give up...
Be humble...
Be sincere...
Forgive others, that it may be forgiven her...
Forgive herself, that she may find peace and true joy
Live every day without regrets...
Rest...
Remember who she is in Christ (a new creation) and remember His everlasting love for her...
Reach for the stars...
Be a blessing. Serve...give...smile...share...touch...Care
"You saw me thirsty and gave me to drink...naked and clothed me, hungry and you did not turn me away."
Mt. 25:34-36
"Drink from the living water that you may never thirst again."
Jn 4:13-14
"Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Mt. 11:29-30
Beloved sisters, walk in these things and you will be blessed. The light of God will be with you because you are walking in the footsteps of our Lord and Savior.
I love you each dearly, and pray that you call upon Him who is able to mend our hearts.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Masquerade: What to make of images and flattery?
Will the real story please step forward?
How easy it is to get caught up in the false flattery of the world and to get stuck up on some "image." Its either I want to be like that, or I am like this.
Yet outside appearances are so shallow and so easily mistaken. Some become very good at putting on a smile even if they do feel like crap and this is called good "customer service." Some are very good at putting that same smile on their life, and this is called "trying to fit in with everyone else.'" Maybe they don't want to "inconvenience" others with their needs, when it is really pride keeping them from confiding in another. How many times have they confided in you? Yet sometimes it seems the needs are too great... People can only take so much. its true. and while God gave us relationships so that we can be an encouragement to each other and help lift the good out of people and be there for one another. Sometimes it is simply difficult to express such needs to others... the need that they should encourage you. Why, its one thing to be the one encouraging them, and it is good to do so actively, because we thrive from encouragement from one another, but sometimes, its difficult to ask for such encouragement from someone else.
Its truly a good thing to feel good about yourself... It is good to go forward and push ahead and reach for the stars and dreams. And BELIEVE that it will be done.
Sometimes life feels like a masquerade. When I feel down, I definitely don't want to take anyone down in that pit with me, so what happens?
I feel convicted from any people pleasing or falsehood that has corrupted my way. That has caused me to step outside of my limits for the sake of someone else. In this instance that would do them no good. It will not make the person feel good for causing you to step outside of your comfort. I don't know what this is that causes me to alejar from the people who could help me most, but when I am specifically feeling that i am failing in something, and if I need help, I feel instead that my "friends' will judge me, and I have a hard time asking for that help. I know that I can say no and should practice it more. I sometimes feel fine about something, but then go away and feel uneasy in my heart as if I am going beyond what I wanted to do.
I hope and pray that my love for God is not so back and forth. That I do not say to him, yes I will yes I will, while all the while my heart says, wait. stop. no. I do not want such a foolish naive and wimpy indefensive thing.
I know what I practiced as a child, and it had to do with submission. In my childlike understanding, it was important to put the needs of others on a pedestal. I do not know why this happened, but I felt that if I were to be like Christ, and "take up my cross" and follow him, then I would put to death any self will and serve others.
I do not say that I was not still the same little girl who loved to have my daddy's smile and pleasure, and intentionally put myself in a place to receive it. I think I thought that he would love me more if I was the best behaved, if I helped him to take care of the people in the family then it wouldn't be such a big burden for him. I wanted to help. I wanted to serve.
Perhaps in a way, my world was still all about me. Sure, I wanted to serve God with all my heart, and I loved him so much, well, He saved me out of my sins. What was there not to serve. I loved him, and beyond that, I felt his call to ministry on my life.
What if the very devil himself masquerades so well that his face appears like that so beautiful one would not recognize his countenance as evil. How many will he deceive?
I will not be among the deceived who receive his wicked way. For I follow the one and only true God, the great I AM who was is and will be.
This world is not my home and I know that I am an alien here. It has been my greatest comfort since I was young, that I would one day be with you, Yah. It is a beautiful thing.
How easy it is to get caught up in the false flattery of the world and to get stuck up on some "image." Its either I want to be like that, or I am like this.
Yet outside appearances are so shallow and so easily mistaken. Some become very good at putting on a smile even if they do feel like crap and this is called good "customer service." Some are very good at putting that same smile on their life, and this is called "trying to fit in with everyone else.'" Maybe they don't want to "inconvenience" others with their needs, when it is really pride keeping them from confiding in another. How many times have they confided in you? Yet sometimes it seems the needs are too great... People can only take so much. its true. and while God gave us relationships so that we can be an encouragement to each other and help lift the good out of people and be there for one another. Sometimes it is simply difficult to express such needs to others... the need that they should encourage you. Why, its one thing to be the one encouraging them, and it is good to do so actively, because we thrive from encouragement from one another, but sometimes, its difficult to ask for such encouragement from someone else.
Its truly a good thing to feel good about yourself... It is good to go forward and push ahead and reach for the stars and dreams. And BELIEVE that it will be done.
Sometimes life feels like a masquerade. When I feel down, I definitely don't want to take anyone down in that pit with me, so what happens?
I feel convicted from any people pleasing or falsehood that has corrupted my way. That has caused me to step outside of my limits for the sake of someone else. In this instance that would do them no good. It will not make the person feel good for causing you to step outside of your comfort. I don't know what this is that causes me to alejar from the people who could help me most, but when I am specifically feeling that i am failing in something, and if I need help, I feel instead that my "friends' will judge me, and I have a hard time asking for that help. I know that I can say no and should practice it more. I sometimes feel fine about something, but then go away and feel uneasy in my heart as if I am going beyond what I wanted to do.
I hope and pray that my love for God is not so back and forth. That I do not say to him, yes I will yes I will, while all the while my heart says, wait. stop. no. I do not want such a foolish naive and wimpy indefensive thing.
I know what I practiced as a child, and it had to do with submission. In my childlike understanding, it was important to put the needs of others on a pedestal. I do not know why this happened, but I felt that if I were to be like Christ, and "take up my cross" and follow him, then I would put to death any self will and serve others.
I do not say that I was not still the same little girl who loved to have my daddy's smile and pleasure, and intentionally put myself in a place to receive it. I think I thought that he would love me more if I was the best behaved, if I helped him to take care of the people in the family then it wouldn't be such a big burden for him. I wanted to help. I wanted to serve.
Perhaps in a way, my world was still all about me. Sure, I wanted to serve God with all my heart, and I loved him so much, well, He saved me out of my sins. What was there not to serve. I loved him, and beyond that, I felt his call to ministry on my life.
What if the very devil himself masquerades so well that his face appears like that so beautiful one would not recognize his countenance as evil. How many will he deceive?
I will not be among the deceived who receive his wicked way. For I follow the one and only true God, the great I AM who was is and will be.
This world is not my home and I know that I am an alien here. It has been my greatest comfort since I was young, that I would one day be with you, Yah. It is a beautiful thing.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Lagrimas
Las lagrimas salen de mis ojos
A pensar en lo que aprendí
Se vale mis palabras?
El ruego de mi corazon se oye?
La pureza cuesta, amor me cuesta
Mi garganta está seca, no puedo parar
Los imagenes son sus dioses
Toman lugar secreto de sus corazones
Imagenes vergonzosas y sensuales
Enemigos de Dios, ellas
Dios, por favor escucha mi oracion. Hay nadie que haya guardado? hay ninguna que no ha vuelto sus ojos?
Las trampas del diablo a mi tambien me han engañado. Si voy a juzgar, me juzgo primeramente a mi misma.
Pero, el dolor de mi corazon esta presente. Las palabras inexplicables ni quiero vocalizarlas.
Por favor Dios, ayudanos. Vuelvanos a su santo santuario. Mi corazon está rota.
Mi Dios, se me disilusiona la vida. Se derrite todo mi ser. Para que he esperado si no es en ti? Para que me he mantenido si no era para honrarte?
pero todavia una esperanza viene del profundo... si hay unas gotas de esperanza allí. Y dicen...
Señor, No hay por lo menos uno?
Me conoces desde mi profundo y de mi juventud. Por favor Señor, guardalo en sus brazos, protegelo de la tentación. Protege la pureza de su corazon y traelo sano.
Me conoces Señor. Y te pido en el nombre de su Hijo Jesus con gracias.
A pensar en lo que aprendí
Se vale mis palabras?
El ruego de mi corazon se oye?
La pureza cuesta, amor me cuesta
Mi garganta está seca, no puedo parar
Los imagenes son sus dioses
Toman lugar secreto de sus corazones
Imagenes vergonzosas y sensuales
Enemigos de Dios, ellas
Dios, por favor escucha mi oracion. Hay nadie que haya guardado? hay ninguna que no ha vuelto sus ojos?
Las trampas del diablo a mi tambien me han engañado. Si voy a juzgar, me juzgo primeramente a mi misma.
Pero, el dolor de mi corazon esta presente. Las palabras inexplicables ni quiero vocalizarlas.
Por favor Dios, ayudanos. Vuelvanos a su santo santuario. Mi corazon está rota.
Mi Dios, se me disilusiona la vida. Se derrite todo mi ser. Para que he esperado si no es en ti? Para que me he mantenido si no era para honrarte?
pero todavia una esperanza viene del profundo... si hay unas gotas de esperanza allí. Y dicen...
Señor, No hay por lo menos uno?
Me conoces desde mi profundo y de mi juventud. Por favor Señor, guardalo en sus brazos, protegelo de la tentación. Protege la pureza de su corazon y traelo sano.
Me conoces Señor. Y te pido en el nombre de su Hijo Jesus con gracias.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Make your best friend a priority
My dear friends,
It has been some time since I have written you. I wanted to share with you something that has been on my journey right now.
God has been opening my eyes to a weakness that has stopped me from receiving the fullness of His presence.
A pure heart must be protected and guarded. If we are really doing everything possible to raise up a standard of purity, we must "pull out all the stops."
I am doing a new challenge. I must start somewhere, and I will keep you posted as to how it goes. Since I really desire to have a pure heart, and that God should be the receptor and the giver of love to fill my soul, then I need to prioritize my relationships.
Prioritizing our relationships is not always an easy thing. Time can be easily swallowed on chat programs on the computer, or friendships that feed something in us, ...
I recognize that I must choose to be intentional. I have had poor boundaries with time. I have not listened always to what is most important and actually given food for the fire of unhealthy or inconsistent relationships.
I'm so thankful that God is so patient and doesn't give up on my slow learning.
My best friend, (God), should be my first priority. My other best friends should be girls... unless of course I am going to marry some guy.
I guess that is just the way I see it. So, I have had a couple of guy friends who I would consider best friends... but, the time and energy I give to those relationships can and does cause other feelings to develop. I am learning, and slowly I might add, that those friendships end up causing confusion.
Confusion is not of God.
It has been some time since I have written you. I wanted to share with you something that has been on my journey right now.
God has been opening my eyes to a weakness that has stopped me from receiving the fullness of His presence.
A pure heart must be protected and guarded. If we are really doing everything possible to raise up a standard of purity, we must "pull out all the stops."
I am doing a new challenge. I must start somewhere, and I will keep you posted as to how it goes. Since I really desire to have a pure heart, and that God should be the receptor and the giver of love to fill my soul, then I need to prioritize my relationships.
Prioritizing our relationships is not always an easy thing. Time can be easily swallowed on chat programs on the computer, or friendships that feed something in us, ...
I recognize that I must choose to be intentional. I have had poor boundaries with time. I have not listened always to what is most important and actually given food for the fire of unhealthy or inconsistent relationships.
I'm so thankful that God is so patient and doesn't give up on my slow learning.
My best friend, (God), should be my first priority. My other best friends should be girls... unless of course I am going to marry some guy.
I guess that is just the way I see it. So, I have had a couple of guy friends who I would consider best friends... but, the time and energy I give to those relationships can and does cause other feelings to develop. I am learning, and slowly I might add, that those friendships end up causing confusion.
Confusion is not of God.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Worth the wait
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f30S5KMJArI&feature=related
Watch this story!
This is an adorable story of two lovers. Who had their very first kiss on their wedding day.
"All things are possible for those who believe."
Psalms 37:23-24 says,
"If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds his hand."
Be strong! X O X O
Watch this story!
This is an adorable story of two lovers. Who had their very first kiss on their wedding day.
"All things are possible for those who believe."
Psalms 37:23-24 says,
"If the Lord delights in a man's way, he makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds his hand."
Be strong! X O X O
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